Thursday, December 13, 2007

A woman's ode to me

Alanis Morissette- Uninvited

Like anyone would be
I am flattered by your fascination with me
Like any hot blooded woman
I have simply wanted an object to crave
But you, you're not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate sight

Must be strangely exciting
To watch the stoic squirm
Must be somewhat heartening
To watch shepherd meet shepherd
But you, you're not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate sight

Like any uncharted territory
I must seem greatly intriguing
You speak of my love like
You have experienced love like mine before
But this is not allowed
You're uninvited
An unfortunate sight

I don't think you unworthy
I need a moment to deliberate

Saturday, December 08, 2007

God is a dick

just wish He did cut me some fucking slack for once in my life.

Yeah im selfish. Deal with it

Monday, December 03, 2007

re post dated june 6/7/07

this post i going to be an esotoric one but then again its not like a lot of you get what im really saying most of the time anyway.

having read that post, i suppose you have a right to get freaked. i mean, putting yourself in your shoes i would too. imagine someone you havent seen in years suddenly reappears in your life again and declares an interest and fondness in you while you're still in a strong and stable relationship with a significant other. by all means, getting freaked would be a totally reasonable response. on my part though, there isint much that i cant say that isint said, if you get the oxymoron in that. you cant be together with me and vice versa. im just lovesick yes but im not blind. it wont happen anytime soon and, looking at the strength of your current relationship, i dare say never. i guess u could say i was waxing lyrical and hoping against hope when i said u needed to be saved from that relationship. fuck, what do i know? absolutely nothing. all i hear is hearsay and make my own assumptions which i know is wrong of me to do because what you do or who you date in your life is really none of my business and i really wouldnt know any better. so thus, you need not be afraid or freaked. i know its not going to happen. and we can leave it at that and still be friends or we can take the inevitable road i always take and watch what little retlations and communications we have and watch it all fade away into nothing but a fond memory. Personally the latter choice would be most preferrable but i leave that to you and fate

this isint goodbye, its just a statement of the stance im taking and the choices available. i cant kid myself by chanting the mantra that im strong and i can forget you as ever being more than a friend and saying goodbye. like i said in the post mentioned in the title, you really make me happy in ways you would never know, nor would i tell you to maintain your happy status, you arent the bad person. you're just living your life your way. if anyone is the villian here its me for wanting another man's woman. and this whole wanting is tearing away at the bastion that is my principles.

i guess what im really trying to say is that the truth is out there, i really like you. im not using the words love here because its a very strong word that i rarely use nowadays because it can mean so much more than just 4 letters. and technically i dont really know you to say i love you, but you're the only girl i know who has never been cruel to me that isint a relative.whether or not thats a good justification or not i dont know but i dont think at this point and time it would really matter. i like you a lot, and until such time where i find the perenial "one" i stand by it. i dare not place such hopes that you are the one because it just hurts too much when hopes and dreams are eventually crushed by bitter reality. but what is a man if he does not have hopes and aspirations right?

till and when and if you read this dear girl, i wont say a thing. just know that if ever fate would be so kind as to smile on the two of us one day, i would be the happiest man in the world. but until that day my dear heart, i'll be here as a friend. and nothing more.

okay. you can start with the "OMG just, get a grip of your emo self etc etc etc" comments now. if people still read this blog that is.