Response

this is a response to http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2009/11/30/focus/5205852&sec=focus

To AR, I passed, Subang Jaya

Having read your letter, I'm somewhat amused that you think we actually live in a system that works. Could you please tell that to the batch of students who aren't allowed to go to university due to a quota system EVEN THOUGH they've worked hard at their grades. Similarly, to say that Professional Exams in this country run on a fair system is a somewhat myopic view. It's all well and good to stand on the other side having passed the examination and judge those who you have seemed fit to deem lazy, or that they did not care about their studies or some other condescending remark that you care to pass. This is not taking away anything from your kind self. I'm sure you worked hard to achieve your passing grade and kudos. But don't you dare sit there and say that everyone else was just too stupid and lazy to pass their exams. Even you've said it, 9% passing rate is disgraceful. But to place the blame solely on the 91% of those who failed is irrational. I take great offense to your condescending tone. Just because you were one of the lucky few to escape the quota does not give you the right to be holier than the rest of us. Yes, I agree Professional Exams need to be tough to maintain standards, but a 9% passing rate is just ridiculous. The whys and wherefores of this I shall not delve into, but suffice to say, it is not a fair system. You need to get off your pedestal and realize this and stop criticizing those who have to go through the misfortune of repeating a professional exam through no fault of their own, other than being a victim of the system.

Memorable quotes 2

Me( Valentines Day 2005): Hey, wanna buy something for your Valentine?
Random Girl: Erm, I don't have a boyfriend.
Me: I can be your boyfriend
Random Girl: *laughs
Me: Everything on this table is for sale. EVERYTHING

Me: Yes, this bus goes through Ashton Road
Old white guy: Oh. Thank you. You speak very good english
Me: Thanks. So do you.
Old white guy: *Puzzled expression

Interviewer: Oh, your english name is also your chinese name! How clever!
Me: Thanks. My parent's thought so too.

Me: I'll have a.. um...um...er...ah...er..um..um...ah...erm...
Hooters Waitress: My face is up here sweetie
Me: I'll have a bud light!

Drunk white girl: So where are you staying? Do you have a place of your own?
Me: Oh, No I don't have a place of my own. I'm a tourist.
Drunk white girl: Oh cool! I'm a Pieces.
Me: *sniggers

Random girl: Hey Ju-lian. Are you on drugs
Me:... Do you want the politically correct answer or should I just say yes?
Random girl: *Puzzled expression

Random Internet Chat girl: You are understand?
Me: Nope. I'm Ju-Lian
Random Internet Chat girl has left chat

Jeremy: You don't have a hand towel in the toilet?
Me: No
Jeremy: That doesn't make sense. How do you dry your hands?
Me: I guess i just jazz hands it

Random Internet Chat Girl 2(RICG2): Hi there!
Me: Hello
RICG2: a/s/l/r?
Me: 17/m/kl/c. You?
RICG2: 17/f/seremban/c
Me: so what are you doing on so late?
RICG2: bored. looking for internet sex
RICG2: im wearing nothing but a yellow thong.
Me: You're a guy right?
RICG2 has left chat.

Me: Man, I miss having a girlfriend
Lesbian Roommate: Yeah, me too.
Me: *puzzled expression (Inner Voice) Aw come on! Seriously? Even here?

Me: Arvind! Heal me!
Arvind: I can't! Im out of mana!
Me: Your fucking mana's like your wallet! Always fucking empty!

Michelle: I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you
Me: Well it's a little too late for that now isn't it?

Acquaintance: Gi Gyn said you have stalker eyes
Me: The latest product from ZsaZsa's eye make up line

Acquaintance 2: Wow Ju-lian. your eyes are bloodshot. Didn't get enough sleep?
Me: Yes Captain Obvious
Acquaintance 2: Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today
Me: Im a morning person. Can't you tell?

Kevin: Man, what if we could get smart by fucking nerds? *humps imaginary nerd
Me: I'll bet they're saying "Oh Kev! You're harder than Intellectual Property!"
Shah: *uncontrollable laughter

Random guy at school: Hey Ju-Lian I've been hearing the guys talk about you. Can I just ask..are you really Jewish?
Me: DO I FUCKING LOOK JEWISH TO YOU??

Grandma: So how does Ju's girlfriend look like?
Aunt: Well, she's kinda chubby.
Grandma: Well, it's not like Ju's thin. Fat people need love too you know?

Order Date: 26/11/09 Order time: 21:19

Phone No: XXXX XXXX Customer Name: Teh Juan

Memorable quotes 1

Me:(circa 1994-1995): Mom, why didn't dad stay at home tonight?
Mom: Ju, he's not going to be staying here anymore.

Me (2002): Good Morning Ms Nathan.
Ms Nathan: Good Morning Ju-Lian. We're done with class yes?
Me: ...Yes
Ms Nathan: Alright, I'll see you next week. Have a good weekend
Me: You too Ms Nathan
Mohd. Faliq: Ju-lian, where's Ms Nathan? *peers out classroom window. Is she coming?
Me: She thought that class was over. I didn't feel the need to inform her otherwise.

Me(2001): I love you
Michelle: I love you too

Me (2001): Do you love me?
Michelle: I don't know
Me: ... What do you mean?
Michelle: There's someone else...

Me(2003) : Hey Yoke Leng, you managed to get the reload card right?
Yoke Leng: Yes. Thank you.
Me: Cool
Yoke Leng: Hey.. You know I have a boyfriend right?
Me: No.. But thanks for telling me.
Me(out of earshot): Fuck...

Me (2003 post first kiss): I love you
Michelle: I love you too.
Me: ..Was it supposed to be that wet?

Me (2003): I wish this could last forever
Michelle: Hmmm?
Me: Lying in bed with you in my arms
Michelle: Mmm

Michelle: Shut up and kiss me already
Me: Yes maam

Michelle(2004): I don't love you anymore. I still have feelings for them
Me: What do you mean?
Michelle: I'm still a lesbian.
Michelle: Can I come over and collect my stuff from your place?
Me: Take your shit and get the hell out of my life

Me(2005): Are you alright?
Gi Gyn: Yeah. Thanks for catching me
Me: It's alright
Gi Gyn: Did I step on your feet?
Me: Yeah
Gi Gyn: Ohmigod, I'm so sorry
Me: Don't worry about it

Me: I'm bored. You?
Gi Gyn: Very
Me: Want to have lunch later? Just you and me?
Gi Gyn: I would love to
Me: I'm thinking chicken rice
Gi Gyn: Me too
Me: Great minds think alike. Or should that be hungry stomach?

Me: Hey.
Gi Gyn: Hi
Me: How was the weekend?
Gi Gyn: Boring
Me: I can relate
Surin: Whoo.. Gi gyn and Ju-lian going out!
Gi Gyn: We're not going out.

Me: Are you pissed at me or something?
Gi Gyn: No
Me: Then why aren't you talking to me and ignoring me and shit?
Gi Gyn: You just need to relax alright?
Me: Sure...

Tupps: Give it up man. She's just a bitch
Me: I seem to be attracting that sort a lot lately.

Me(2006): Dad, I passed second year. All the subjects
Dad: That's good to hear son. Im proud of you.

Me (2006. Bristol): Hi. Wanna dance?
I dont remember your name: Sure!
Me(later): You dance really well.
Nameless: Thanks!
Me: Where are you from?
Nameless: Subang
Me: Cool. You want to get a drink? On me
Nameless: Sure!
Me(even later): So...um... do you have a boyfriend here in Bristol?
Nameless: Nope. Single.
Some guy: Hey baby! *hugs her from behind
Nameless: Hey
Me(end of the evening): So who was that guy?
Nameless:..It's complicated
Me: Uh huh...

Me( circa 22nd birthday; inebriated): Did you know Amzonian warriors cut of their left tit so that it wouldnt interfere with their bow string when they drew their bows?
Adam: I think you've had enough to drink Ju
Me: Quite possibly...

Drunk white girl: You're all Malaysian??
Me: Yeah
Drunkie: But you look like you're from China, and you look like you're from India
Me: Yeah, we're a multi racial country
Drunkie: Oh wow! Can you speak some Malaysian for me?
Me(to Shah and Kevin): Apa 'sal perempuan mabuk ni?

Me(now) : I need to get laid

Me: Does she speak english?
Owner of reputable establishment: No, she can speak Lao
Me: Right. And that's supposed to help me how?

Me: I think I can do radio
Tupps: Yeah? Do an improv announcement now
Me: And thats all for sports. In other news Lady Gaga may in fact be a man. So, are we supposed to address her as Sir Gaga now?

Hot neighbor: Oh what a cutie!
Me: Thanks! The dog's cute too right?
Hot neighbor: *awkward and slightly frightened laugh

Me: You guys think im just a sexual deviant is it?
Dre and Arvind: Er....
Me: You guys know me so well

Me: So, you got a boyfriend?
Hilda: Nope
Me(Inner voice): Alright...
Hilda: I have a fiancee
Me(Inner voice): Fuck...

Me: So i just did this compatibility test thing and it say me and yoke leng are 50% compatible
Arvind: Eh, so that means you can... and cannot lar
Me: .....ok Genius

Review for year ending 2009

December 08: Looking for job. Wanting independence and a chance to prove that the world is my oyster. Towards Christmas it seems like an exercise in futility. Melancholic at New Years Eve.

January: Still looking for a job. Turned down offers on dad's insistence and my own. At logger heads with the old man regarding career paths. A 23 year old law graduate who failed his bar exam, jobless and still depending on parental allowance.

February: Yoke Leng. Painful realization its not going to happen despite best intentions. Michelle, rekindled. Kissed. Start to a descent. Got a job at Project Malaysia. Research Assistant. Working with Malik Imtiaz and Michelle Gunaselan. Excited. Paternal Grandfather died. Tears.

March: Progress. Work and semi love life with Michelle. First pay check. Gave dad Rm300. First published article. Slumdog Millionaire. Fight with Michelle. Worst to come

April: Michelle is gone. For good. Not dead, don't misunderstand. Just emotionally. Works starts to get frustrating. Lots of false pontificates. Wrote second article. Unpublished.

May: Work continues to stall. Growing frustration. Wrote 3rd article. Not published. E-mails and calls. No reply. Feel an ever widening emotional gulf

June: Fuck work. Michael Jackson died. Felt a little bit sad. Hypocritical me and the world. Start to drink again. Not due to Michael Jackson's death. Wrote 4 and 5th article. Unpublished

July: Too boring to remember. Hate work for lack of work. Worrying about future employment. Smoking more than usual.

August: Independence day. Forgettable as usual. Contract extension to the end of the year. Will still be able to pay bills. Nice new LCD tv. Rediscovered martial arts.

September: 24th anniversary of my birth. Injured back. Drinking regularly. Attending martial arts class. Nice hobby from humdrum. Promise self to lose weight and quit drinking and smoking

October: Phuket trip. Best time of my life so far. See work as nothing but a passionless paycheck. Wrote 6th article. Still unpublished.

November: Wrote 7th article. Unpublished. Maternal Grandfather dies.

Today: 3 hours before final funeral rites and the burial proper. Two days of Taoist rituals. I can't shed tears but am still sad nonetheless. I think I only ever said 10 words to the man. I didnt speak Hakka. He didnt speak English. I lost both grandfather's in the space of 9 months. I am still single with no Michelle sans the drama like replacement in sight. Drinking more frequently than usual. Smoking more. Gained more weight instead of losing. Fear I am going down a self destructive road of no return. Hope everything turns out for the better next month and next year. Am highly doubtful.

It's been some year.

This is why I don't blog regularly.

Anecdote

I remember there was this one time in college; I was sitting at the Registry waiting to register myself for my A-Levels exams. It was October. I remember being bored and looking around my surroundings. I remember the water feature and the turtles swimming under the man made pseudo waterfall. I remember looking up at the various banners of institutions of learning that were affiliated with my own college, fluttering, surprisingly, despite the fact that we were indoors, subterranean no less. I remember looking at the fine, fine specimens of the opposite sex, eagerly walking at a brisk pace to get to a class to enrich themselves with an education sponsored by their parents and/or dictated by the norms of a society that deem themselves fit to judge us, their peers.

There they were, sashaying this way and that, with their bright pink files filled with notes, colour coordinated outfits of varying scales of lookability and a subtle designer handbags and the latest in technological bits and ends comprising of what we now know as Ipods but were then called, simply, Portable mp3 music players, the latest(then) handphones with polyphonic ringtones and 1.2 megapixel cameras accompanied with handsfree sets completing their ensemble.

I have this tendency to look people in the eye, even though I don't want the viewee to know that I'm looking at them. Which I realize now after reading previous sentence, is very oxymoronic. It's a trait that has, and still does, haunt me to this day as being very stalker-ish, but I digress. With said stalker eyes I viewed these eager beavers(pun semi unintended) with what I thought were very appreciative eyes but were perceived as being very creepy and aforementioned stalker like and they thus quickened their steps to get away from your scribes field of vision. This continued for some time as I awaited with barely contained impatience for my number to mystically illuminate on the ticket counter number thingy to resolve my bureaucratic necessities with the Registry. As I watched the latest progeny of Eve sashay of my vision, I noticed something odd approaching my general direction.

It was what I presumed was a short female but there was something rather monstrous about her face. The first thought that crossed my mine was "Hey, it's only the middle of October. Isn't Halloween not for another 2 weeks? Some people are being a little bit over enthusiastic for some Western customs aren't they?" As the mask wearer got closer I started to realize that it wasn't a mask. It was her face.

Have you ever seen the Elephant man Joseph Merrick? Yeah. It was like that. On a slightly smaller scale. And a female. I couldn't stop starring. Something in the back of my mind told me not to. That it was just so fucking rude. That mom and dad brought me up better than that. I ignored it out of sheer curiosity. I wasn't repulsed but just intrigued, trying to study as much as I could of her face, so morbidly fascinating was the experience. Her face was bloated and I couldn't even see her eyes. Her left cheek was so distended that it looked like she was perpetually puffing. Her entire face was blue and black all over from what I've researched on Neurofibromatosis type 1 as due to severe bruising from muscle and nerve distention. I just stared and stared, mouth agape, even as she walked past me. When she was directly in front of me our eyes met, or more accurately the two little beads I could only assume were here eyes. And in that moment, I saw the pain and sorrow and humiliation that she had to endure from people like me who starred at her like some sort of monstrous sideshow oddity. All my shallow problems then seemed nothing compared what she had to face everyday.

In that moment, I realized I was such an asshole.

I don't know why I'm telling you this. It could have been one of the many skeletons that could have stayed in my closet. I don't feel any better confessing it. If anything this little anecdote has achieved is help spread the word about Neurofibromatosis type 1. Or it establishes that fact I'm, besides being homophobic, a real asshole when it comes to judging people on first impressions. I would like to think that what I take away from this is that, like the girl, I'm just human, and I have and will continue to make mistakes. Whichever way you chose to take it

I'm sorry Neurofibromatosis girl..

esoteric/random bites

I find it a little bit strange that your wardrobe is 85% sleeveless shirts, spaghetti straps and various other sleeveless apparel but when you see me you're always covering your sleeves. I also find it strange that you always seem to want to call a third party along when I ask you out when it's pretty obvious it's only your company that I prefer at said time and indeed, that was said intention of me asking you out in the first place. You could be shy I suppose, but I have ever been the perfect gentleman. Sadly, I guess the gut and the facial hair and the whole OhMyGodHeUsedToLikeMe and HeUsedToStareAtMeConstantly memories from the evergreen college years remain my legacy at a certain Higher Education Learning Programme Institute and continue to haunt me even in my post college years.

No, you may not sue me for being discriminatory against homosexuals. I merely stated my personal opinion that I disagree with their lifestyle. I did not in any way or form say that they shouldn't be homosexual, nor did I propagate any hate crimes against them. Sure, I may not understand them fully, and I draw upon personal experiences for having such personal opinions, but I do not hate them Hitler style. Neither would I frequent gay/lesbian clubs/events carrying hateful placards and chanting discriminatory slogans. I do not consider them less then human for I know that they are. I just don't agree with their lifestyle. Let that be the end of the matter

The cows go moo, and they can't get a permit because of their skins. They defile a sacred article of faith, spat out and photographed no less, and the only man who has the courage to say anything sits on the feather throne no longer. They say no, and they repress the press. They snatch the dead before they're even in the ground. They whip and cane those they feel deserve it, while the deserving get away with sin. You can join the club but you can never leave. Not even your spouse. Faith is like the rain from the heavens, man is like the earth. When they meet, only mud is the outcome.

You must know someone to get anywhere. Your merits, your education, your parent's and your own effort, they count for nothing now. Oh yeah, you can probably get some low-mid level job, but will you ever be the man on top? Not unless you know somebody. Hell, I knew somebody. You can call it contacts and networking. No one seems to think its all about the fact that its not what you know, its who you know.

"Anarchism, then, really stands for the liberation of the human mind from the dominion of religion; the liberation of the human body from the dominion of property; liberation from the shackles and restraint of government. Anarchism stands for a social order based on the free grouping of individuals for the purpose of producing real social wealth; an order that will guarantee to every human being free access to the earth and full enjoyment of the necessities of life, according to individual desires, tastes, and inclinations"- Emma Goldman. You were wrong Emma. You forgot that we're humans first, individuals last.

If you worked at a job offering you 5000rm/month and then someone came along and offered you 10000rm/month, which would you choose?. If you worked at Progressive Ali's Fine Muslim Indian Cuisine Restaurant and someone came and offered you a job BAT for 3x what you're earning, which would you choose? Your school nurtured you and taught you to become the man you are, but would you then be obliged to work for them once you graduate? Think about that Fédération Internationale de Football Association before you decide to condescend and make an example out of certain English clubs. And to a certain French club in the city of Lens, that's football, its a business, not oh boo hoo mama, he stole my toy.

I'm guilty, green slippers. I suppose i should say sorry, but I dint think it will help. Yes, I will just relax.

I spend time with you and you call it smothering and clingy. I dint spend time with you and you say I'm not giving you enough attention. Hey, I'm not a mind reader. Pick a fucking stance and stick by it. You can't have your cake and fucking eat it too. This saying comes from the notion that one should share a cake because cake should be shared and not eaten alone. Therefore, it would be wrong to have the cake and eat the whole bloody thing and not share it, you greedy little fuck.

Yes it occurred to me that the post was made on 9/9/09. And that should have special significance why?Because it will never happen again? Big deal. A date's a date, just numbers to help the human mind make sense of time in motion. On the numerology stance, well, I can humbly state that I personally think its all bullshit and don't believe a single iota of it.The same with horoscopes. My life is not dictated by a couple of numbers or how the stars are aligned. It's by the choices I make, right or wrong, and how I live by them.

You're never happy unless you're unhappy. Which is why I think that we could have never worked out. Besides the whole difference of opinion on sexual orientation. You can't accept the fact that life has indeed given you a ladle of the gravy train and that life's must always be about the struggle, the shit. Look, it's not my fault you have an inferiority complex, or that life has been one pile after another of shit to you since your dad left, or the guy(s) you "loved" treated you like shit and broke your heart. You have to realize that Im not, nor have I ever been,that guy or like your dad(and I dont mean that in a Oedipus Complex way) and that you can't use that as an excuse and justification for hurting me and people like me. Yes, I may have faults, who doesn't, but the least you can do is have some common courtesy and overlook them, like how I did yours. And don't get it twisted. This has nothing to do with sexuality. This has to do with character and personality. Meh, what do I know? Im just some emo fuck.

Keep your hips squared. Hunch your back. Keep your chin in. Hands on your forehead. Keep your back foot up and bend the knees. Circle off. T.E.S. Balance. Conditioning. Crazy Monkey Defence Programme. Armbar. Those are the words that constantly permeate my mind currently

Homosexual Propoganda debunked/ Mom read the bottom of this article

So here we are again after a long exile from blogsphere. Not here to make apologies, for I feel I have none to make to the 5 of you reading this. I do not think it is my duty or obligation to burden and pontificate my personal world views to you, or bore you with tedious details of what I did, who I went out with and the contents of my bowels once it has been expunged from my body through my anus. You already have CNN and the E!channel for all that good stuff, sans bowel content(it does not make for good conversation unless you have constipation and said conversation takes place in the confines of the clinic with a doctor and maybe nosy attending nurse).

I do however have to pontificate on a personal world view that most of you have already called me out on and metaphorically tarred and feathered me and severed long standing ties with. Yes, I'm talking about homosexuals. I have, and will, never believe the main argument that the homosexual propaganda machine tries to enforce and uphold for its own political agenda that homosexuals are born the way they are and that there is an inherent gay gene which causes said homosexuality. No one is born that way. There is no gay gene. Any "research paper" that you have read doesn't know the first thing about genetics and the slightest hope that homosexuals can see as a self justifying mechanism in regards to these "researches" are pounced upon by the liberal homosexual propaganda machine.

And just before you start you attacks and blog/flame wars and "oh ju-lian you're so blinded and biased and write such hurtful things" comments because you think I'm just blowing smoke up your ass and propagating homosexual hate crimes(which I'm not you fucking overly sensitive prick/bitch) here's my proof.

Is there a gay gene?

Many laymen now believe that homosexuality is part of who a person really is ­ from the moment of conception.

The "genetic and unchangeable" theory has been actively promoted by gay activists and the popular media. Is homosexuality really an inborn and normal variant of human nature?

No. There is no evidence that shows that homosexuality is simply "genetic." And none of the research claims there is. Only the press and certain researchers do, when speaking in sound bites to the public.

How The Public Was Misled

In July of 1993, the prestigious research journal Science published a study by Dean Hamer which claims that there might be a gene for homosexuality. Research seemed to be on the verge of proving that homosexuality is innate, genetic and therefore unchangeablea normal variant of human nature.

Soon afterward, National Public Radio trumpeted those findings. Newsweek ran the cover story, "Gay Gene?" The Wall Street Journal announced, "Research Points Toward a Gay Gene...Normal Variation."

Of course, certain necessary qualifiers were added within those news stories. But only an expert knew what those qualifiers meant. The vast majority of readers were urged to believe that homosexuals had been proven to be "born that way."

In order to grasp what is really going on, one needs to understand some little known facts about behavioral genetics.

Gene Linkage Studies

Dean Hamer and his colleagues had performed a common type of behavioral genetics investigation called the "linkage study." Researchers identify a behavioral trait that runs in a family, and then:

a) look for a chromosomal variant in the genetic material of that family, and

b) determine whether that variant is more frequent in family members who share the particular trait.

To the layman, the "correlation" of a genetic structure with a behavioral trait means that trait "is genetic"-in other words, inherited.

In fact, it means absolutely nothing of the sort, and it should be emphasized that there is virtually no human trait without innumerable such correlations.

Scientists Know the Truth about "Gay Gene" Research

But before we consider the specifics, here is what serious scientists think about recent genetics-of-behavior research. From Science, 1994:

Time and time again, scientists have claimed that particular genes or chromosomal regions are associated with behavioral traits, only to withdraw their findings when they were not replicated. "Unfortunately," says Yale's [Dr. Joel] Gelernter, "it's hard to come up with many" findings linking specific genes to complex human behaviors that have been replicated. "...All were announced with great fanfare; all were greeted unskeptically in the popular press; all are now in disrepute."{1}

Homosexual Twin Studies

Two American activists recently published studies showing that if one of a pair of identical twins is homosexual, the other member of the pair will be, too, in just under 50% of the cases. On this basis, they claim that "homosexuality is genetic."

But two other genetic researchers--one heads one of the largest genetics departments in the country, the other is at Harvard--comment:

While the authors interpreted their findings as evidence for a genetic basis for homosexuality, we think that the data in fact provide strong evidence for the influence of the environment.{2}

The author of the lead article on genes and behavior in a special issue of Science speaks of the renewed scientific recognition of the importance of environment. He notes the growing understanding that:

... the interaction of genes and environment is much more complicated than the simple "violence genes" and intelligence genes" touted in the popular press.The same data that show the effects of genes, also point to the enormous influence of non genetic factors.{3}

More Modest Claims to the Scientific Community

Researchers' public statements to the press are often grand and far-reaching. But when answering the scientific community, they speak much more cautiously.

"Gay gene" researcher Dean Hamer was asked by Scientific American if homosexuality was rooted solely in biology. He replied:

"Absolutely not. From twin studies, we already know that half or more of the variability in sexual orientation is not inherited. Our studies try to pinpoint the genetic factors...not negate the psychosocial factors."{4}

But in qualifying their findings, researchers often use language that will surely evade general understanding making statements that will continue to be avoided by the popular press, such as:

...the question of the appropriate significance level to apply to a non Mendelian trait such as sexual orientation is problematic.{5}

Sounds too complex to bother translating? This is actually a very important statement. In layman's terms, this means:

It is not possible to know what the findings mean--if anything--since sexual orientation cannot possibly be inherited in the direct way eye color is.

Thus, to their fellow scientists, the researchers have been honestly acknowledging the limitations of their research. However, the media doesn't understand that message. Columnist Ann Landers, for example, tells her readers that "homosexuals are born, not made." The media offers partial truths because the scientific reality is simply too unexciting to make the evening news; too complex for mass consumption; and furthermore, not fully and accurately understood by reporters.

Accurate Reporting Will Never Come in "Sound Bites"

There are no "lite," soundbite versions of behavioral genetics that are not fundamentally in error in one way or another.

Nonetheless, if one grasps at least some of the basics, in simple form, it will be possible to see exactly why the current research into homosexuality means so little and will continue to mean little, even should the quality of the research methods improve so long as it remains driven by political, rather than scientific objectives.

Understanding the Theory

There are only two major principles that need to be carefully understood in order to see through the distortions of the recent research. They are as follows:

1. Heritable does not mean inherited.

2. Genetics research which is truly meaningful will identify, and then focus on, only traits that are directly inherited.

Almost every human characteristic is in significant measure heritable. But few human behavioral traits are directly inherited, in the manner of height, for example, or eye color. Inherited means "directly determined by genes," with little or no way of preventing or modifying the trait through a change in the environment.

How to "Prove" That Basketball-Players are Born that Way

Suppose you are motivated to demonstrate for political reasons--that there is a basketball gene that makes people grow up to be basketball players. You would use the same methods that have been used with homosexuality: (1) twin studies; (2) brain dissections; (3) gene "linkage" studies.

The basic idea in twin studies is to show that the more genetically similar two people are, the more likely it is that they will share the trait you are studying.

So you identify groups of twins in which at least one is a basketball player. You will probably find that if one identical twin is a basketball player, his twin brother is statistically more likely be one, too. You would need to create groups of different kinds of pairs to make further comparisons--one set of identical twin pairs, one set of nonidentical twin pairs, one set of sibling pairs, etc.

Using the "concordance rate" (the percentage of pairs in which both twins are basketball players, or both are not), you would calculate a "heritability" rate. The concordance rate would be quite high--just as in the concordance rate for homosexuality.

Then, you announce to the reporter from Sports Illustrated: "Our research demonstrates that basketball playing is strongly heritable." (And you would be right. It would be "heritable"--but not directly inherited. Few readers would be aware of the distinction, however.)

Soon after, the article appears. It says:

"...New research shows that basketball playing is probably inherited. Basketball players are apparently 'born that way!' A number of outside researchers examined the work and found it substantially accurate and well performed..."

But no one (other than the serious scientist) notices the media's inaccurate reporting.

What All Neuroscientists Know:
The Brain Changes with Use

Then you move on to conduct some brain research. As in the well-known LeVay brain study which measured parts of the hypothalamus, your colleagues perform a series of autopsies on the brains of some dead people who, they have reason to believe, were basketball players.

Next, they do the same with a group of dead non basketball players. Your colleagues report that, on average, "Certain parts of the brain long thought to be involved with basketball playing are much larger in the group of basketball players."

A few national newspapers pick up on the story and editorialize, "Clearly, basketball playing is not a choice. Not only does basketball playing run in families, but even these people's brains are different."

You, of course, as a scientist, are well aware that the brain changes with use...indeed quite dramatically. Those parts responsible for an activity get larger over time, and there are specific parts of the brain that are more utilized in basketball playing.

Now, as a scientist, you will not lie about this fact, if asked (since you will not be), but neither will you go out of your way to offer the truth. The truth, after all, would put an end to the worldwide media blitz accompanying the announcement of your findings.

Gene Linkage Studies:
"Associated With" Does Not Mean "Caused By"

Now, for the last phase, you find a small number of families of basketball players and compare them to some families of non players. You have a hunch that of the innumerable genes likely to be associated with basketball playing (those for height, athleticism, and quick reflexes, for example), some will be located on the x-chromosome.

You won't say these genes cause basketball playing because such a claim would be scientifically insupportable, but the public thinks "caused by" and "associated with" are synonymous.

After a few false starts, sure enough, you find what you are looking for: among the basketball-playing families, one particular cluster of genes is found more commonly.

With a Little Help from the Media

Now, it happens that you have some sympathizers at National People's Radio, and they were long ago quietly informed of your research. They want people to come around to certain beliefs, too. So, as soon as your work hits the press, they are on the air: "Researchers are hot on the trail of the Basketball Gene. In an article to be published tomorrow in Sports Science..."

Commentators pontificate about the enormous public-policy implications of this superb piece of science. Two weeks later, there it is again, on the cover of the major national newsweekly: "Basketball Gene?"

Now what is wrong with this scenario? It is simple: of course basketball playing is associated with certain genes; of course it is heritable. But it is those intermediate physiological traits-muscle strength, speed, agility, reflex speed, height, etc.-which are themselves directly inherited. Those are the traits that make it likely one will be able to, and will want to, play basketball.

In the case of homosexuality, the inherited traits that are more common among male homosexuals might include a greater than average tendency to anxiety, shyness, sensitivity, intelligence, and aesthetic abilities. But this is speculation. To date, researchers have not yet sought to identify these factors with scientific rigor.

What the majority of respected scientists now believe is that homosexuality is attributable to a combination of psychological, social, and biological factors.

From the American Psychological Association "[M]any scientists share the view that sexual orientation is shaped for most people at an early age through complex interactions of biological, psychological and social factors."{6}

From "Gay Brain" Researcher Simon LeVay "At this point, the most widely held opinion [on causation of homosexuality] is that multiple factors play a role."{7}

From Dennis McFadden, University of Texas neuroscientist: "Any human behavior is going to be the result of complex intermingling of genetics and environment. It would be astonishing if it were not true for homosexuality."{8}

From Sociologist Steven Goldberg "I know of no one in the field who argues that homosexuality can be explained without reference to environmental factors."{9}

As we have seen, there is no evidence that homosexuality is simply "genetic"--and none of the research itself claims there is.

Only the press and certain researchers do, when speaking in sound bites to the public.

Taken from the NARTH(National Association for the Research and Therapy of Homosexuals)

Now I KNOW you must be thinking, oh ju-lian, that taken from such an obviously biased NGO. You've taken it out of context and you're just being spiteful because Michelle hates you now. While you are entitled to whatever notions and opinions you may have, let it be known that I never ever hate for the sake of hating nor do I blindly follow what is being fed to me like the rest of you sheep.

Here's another study, from a NON NGO

The trumpets were left at home and the parades were canceled. The press releases and campaign signs were quietly forgotten. The news was big, but it did not contain what some had hoped for. On April 14, 2003, the International Human Genome Consortium announced the successful completion of the Human Genome Project—two years ahead of schedule. The press report read: “The human genome is complete and the Human Genome Project is over” (see “Human Genome Report...,” 2003, emp. added). Most of the major science journals reported on the progress in the field of genetics, but also speculated on how the information would now be used. The one piece of information that never materialized from the Human Genome Project was the identification of the so-called “gay gene.”

Homosexuality has been practiced for thousands of years. Simply put, homosexuality is defined as sexual relations between like genders (i.e., two males or two females). It was Sigmund Freud who first postulated that parental relationships with a child ultimately determine the youngster’s sexual orientation. But this “nurturing” aspect has effectively given way to the “nature” side of the equation. Can some behaviors (e.g., alcoholism, homosexuality, schizophrenia) be explained by genetics? Are these and other behaviors influenced by nature or by nurture? Are they inborn or learned? Some individuals believed that the answer would be found hiding amidst the chromosomes analyzed in the Human Genome Project.

The human X and Y chromosomes (the two “sex” chromosomes) have been completely sequenced. Thanks to work carried out by labs all across the globe, we know that the X chromosome contains 153 million base pairs, and harbors a total of 1168 genes (see NCBI, 2004). The National Center for Biotechnology Information reports that the Y chromosome—which is much smaller—contains “only” 50 million base pairs, and is estimated to contain a mere 251 genes. Educational institutions such as Baylor University, the Max Planck Institute, the Sanger Institute, Washington University in St. Louis, and others have spent countless hours and millions of research dollars analyzing these unique chromosomes. As the data began to pour in, they allowed scientists to construct gene maps—using actual sequences from the Human Genome Project. And yet, neither the map for the X nor the Y chromosome contains any “gay gene.”

you can read the rest of the legnthy discussion here http://www.trueorigin.org/gaygene01.asp

Now for the kicker. I did not say that you CAN'T be a homosexual. Its a CHOICE and hey, who am I to tell you any differently. I don't agree with your lifestlye choice and thats just my own PERSONAL OPINION and I will defend my right to it. But please do not come and pontificate to me that you're born the way you are. The articles above have proven that that is utter bullshit and written by experts in the field. And im pretty sure they dont have their own homophobic agenda. Dosent bode well for their PhD you see. If im wrong, please feel free to correct me. So yeah, take that liberal media and GLAAD and PLU and Katagender and associated homosexual propoganda machines.

Hope that tides you over for a few months

Congratulations on reaching the end of this article. You've just wasted about 10 minutes of your time which you could have used for more productive things like watching porn or feeding the hungry children of the world or saving the whales. But thank you all the same.

Mom, this is just a status update. Im fine, working, joining the gym, everyone here is fine, there arent any racial riots here, yet. Still smoking but cutting down in an effort to be fit for the gym and not look like a tired fat fool in the workout classes and yes, for my own personal health and well being. Plus please try and get me a LA Dodgers replica baseball (home) jersey with Ethier on the back if they win the World Series in October. No, I can't get it over here. L size should be fine. Hope you're fine too. Love you.
Ju

Keroncong Hujan/ My Yasmin Ahmad tribute

Mega mendung di angkasa
Hembusan bayu dingin terasa
gerimis berderai di merata
bagai mutiara

Rahmat dibawa bersama
Limpahannya meresap dijiwa
adakala bahgia dirasa
meskipun duka nestapa

Tika hujan turun
sayup mendayu lagu keroncong
merdu irama dialun
bersenandung

Hujan membasahi bumi
melahirkan keluhuran budi
mengeratkan paduan suci
kasih sayang abadi

Translation;

Clouds overcast the sky
The gust of a cold breeze is felt
Drizzle drips everywhere
Like pearls

Blessings are brought together
It's gift overflows into the soul
Bliss is sometimes felt
In spite of the sadness of woes

When the rain falls
Faint rumbles(whispers) of a song
With Melodious rhymes bellowing
Croons

Rain wets the earth
Giving birth to noble deeds
Strengthening pure solidarity
An eternal love.




apologies if i've made any mistakes in the translations

Guess not

Nope. Still alive.

Last post(?)

so yeah.. i might be dying due to the H1N1. Watch this space for further developments. Or not, in which case im dead.

I guess some people finally got their wish huh?