irrational flights of misplaced affection

wow..the title is a mouthful isint it? (meant to be connotative in a non sexual reference u sick fuck) ands it just a few minutes apart from the last one. yes...im making up for lost time and unleashing pent up rantration(mangled english...my generation's legacy to the world)
irrational flights of misplaced affection...catchy.. a reality for all of us i guess... it could be that girl which u never really let go and still obsessed over, it could be that eye candy guy u always wanted but already had a steady and hence, not to make yourself look like a home wrecking slut bitch, decide not to move in but instead be suicidal and be "different" in the hopes that eye candy would notice you for all the wrong reasons and therefore stand an absurd chance of making contact. the same applies for guys too...been there and done that and confessing it now. ppl who cut themselves, try to OD on some prescribed pill, honestly...we are all just fucked up attention seekers. yes...i will admit and to some certain extent speak on behalf of self inflicted scarers( SIS...thats a cool abbreviation) that the sudden rush of pain and adrenaline is a temporary emotion substitute...its keeps us from thinking about reality...fucked up as it is. I wont make any excuses...its a fucked up way out.. a cowards way out. truthfully however, we just want pity...but we dont know how to ask for it...to us...the world is just so fucking cold and we did rather invite sympathy rather than ask for it. its like seeing someone who lost a leg..it just invites general sympathy and apathy. why do u think there are still beggers? part of it is also being different from the norm...like the scar tissue is a red badge of courage(read that book) but in essence..its sympathy seeking. anyway...i dont know if im making any sense here...its just a vicious cycle of misplaced affection.. notice us so u can love us through pity.
as for pills...dont know coz i never tried it myself(and dont want to anyway) but i think the weird science applies. immortalized mis-perceived sympathy when all ppl are really saying is how fucked up that suicide case was.
what weird creatures humans are... so complexly beautiful and so savagely ugly at the same time. to put it succinctly and straight to the brutal fucking point...we are all just so fucked up.
bubble heads... damn u and your ignorant naivety. you dont know what its like to hurt. fucking robots.

random quote: Kevin Smith in response to whether he would make a science fiction movie
" A science fiction movie? I think I've made one already.. Chasing Amy. Because you go ask any lesbian, that will never happen, even if, and especially because, the dude is Ben fucking Affleck!"