Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Nazarath sang a song about this

so me and joyce were having this discussion the other day . why is it that a lot of nice, beautiful(remember the difference between a pretty girl and a beautiful lady kiddies) women out there always wind up with the wrong guy? there are a lot of cases in point but for the sake of protecting myself from defamation(because remember, these are assumptions and i dont know what is the REAL story even though its pretty fucking obvious that the dude's mistreating you) i shall not mention any personal cases of which i have heard of and seen first hand. so back to the eternal question... why? is it not human nature that if something hurts us its bad? something that causes pain should be avoided? we should be able to say, 'right, i had enough of this crap, you dont own me, i can do what i want without you controlling me, so fuck off'' right? oh, thats right, its human nature as well not to listen to logic and reason. especially with affairs of the heart. prove me wrong on this point please. its refreshing to hear about something positive about it for once. we think we understand love but at the end of the day its just a veil behind lots and lots of hurt. Love is a makeup covering the ugliness of the truth of hurt. Its basically a fucking excuse isint it? Someone can treat you like shit, worse case scenario, would make you want to kill yourself when you have to realize that you have so much more to life for other than this pathetic excuse of a human being. To your mom's uterus, i say, bad uterus. dont do that again. Unless you're my sibling... good uterus. Its hard to see it happening before your very eyes, knowing that you cant intervene in one's business that isint yours. Could be a sister, a cousin or even the girl you liked who's going out with some shortened name for Richard(in case u didnt get the joke, it was DICK). But what can you do? Love is guided by the heart and not the upper head. We've all been there at some point or another. And when the storm has weathered its easy to sit here and type that, oh, i was such a dumbass. How could i ever love him/her? S/He hurt me so bad. Im glad im not with him/her anymore. Fuck em. See.. real simple. What you dont see is that i still miss her. Yeah, if i can discorporate my logic from my feelings i did just tell myself there's lots of other fish in the sea and thats one chapter of my life im closing. But if i did discorporate then i did just be a fucking robot. Thats what makes us special isint it? The ability to feel. But be warned.. it just defies logic the ammount that we're willing to feel and conceal. And we're willing to conceal a lot so that we can live in ignorant bliss. This whole idea about forgiving and starting anew. For fucks sake my sister/brother, even the Pope can forgive that much before he'll condemn your soul to hell capise? I had to learn that the hard way. I pray that you wont but you would most probably have. I know, i sound capricious and confused about where i stand on this issue. Its because i really am confused. I still have a ribcage and a femur or two lying around in my closet. Look, as Mr Bush once said, fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on you, i mean me. I can only hope that the illusion of love becomes real one day and not something the Halmark company makes money off every anniversary or Februry the 14th. Pick yourself up, free yourself from the chains perceived bliss and open your eyes from the darkness that is denial and realize who you are and what you really want. Then again, when this mantra works i'll be thr first to let you know. its funny, im not even a capricon. im a virgo btw, if you're interested in knowing.

yeah... thats the rant. and in regards to the title, its love hurts.

yay session: yay for vending machines which never close after 10pm, scrubs, the cranberries, Kevin Smith, ryan reynolds, egg and bacon sandwhichs, walker chips, the undertaker who won the royal rumble, life, inspiration for new tattoo.

thank you. rants you later

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